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Confused?
Angry? Not sure what to wear? Ask Velvet!
by
Velvet Brown
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January 1, 2000
Rodney Dangerfield stops love in its tracks; Mia vs. Britney
Dear Velvet,
I met a woman about six weeks ago, and we began dating. Everything
was going great until last Saturday, when we decided to stay in
and rent a movie. Her choice was Ladybugs, in which Rodney Dangerfield
plays the coach of a girls’ soccer team. What’s worse, she said
it’s one of her favorite movies ever! I was shocked. I feigned a
migraine attack to get out of the date, and now I don’t know what
to do. Should I keep seeing this woman?
-Wary in Boston
Dear Wary,
Well, you’re right to be concerned. My instinct is to tell you not
to date people with bad taste in movies. Still, if that’s the only
thing standing between you and the woman of your dreams, you should
definitely give her a second chance. Suggest another date - and
you pick the flick this time. See if she responds favorably to your
choice. She may just need some exposure to better movies, and you
can be the dashing knight who opens her eyes to them. There may
be hope for her yet.
Dear Velvet,
As the parent of a nine-year-old girl, I just want to say that I
think the members of the US Womens’ Soccer Team are much better
role models for our daughters than vapid popstars like Britney Spears
and Christina What’s-Her-Name. -Momma T.
Dear Momma,
I couldn’t agree with you more. As far as I know, Mia Hamm, Brandy
Chastain, et al., can’t carry a tune, but unlike Britney, they have
the sense not to try. Besides, they’re too busy kicking butt. And
speaking of butts (and biceps), it’s nice to see famous women who
don’t look like coathangers with cleavage. Though I am by nature
a mild-mannered advice columnist, this summer I was seriously tempted
to pack it in and become a professional soccer hooligan.
Dear Velvet,
The office I work in tends to be pretty uptight - you know, lots
of guys in blue suits. It doesn’t bother me too much, but yesterday
my boss gave me a lecture because he noticed I wear an earring.
Was he out of line? -Joe Guy
Dear Joe,
Darling, it’s 1999. Take the earring out. And toss the Wham! records
while you’re at it, okay?
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Velvet
Brown is PopPulse’s arbiter of good taste and decorum. Submit your
questions by emailing velvet@poppulse.com.
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